Split and Shyamalan

I finally got to see Split, and I feel like I really need to talk about it and M. Night Shyamalan.  But before going further, know that there will be many spoilers, so please watch Split before reading this.  You should anyways, but I really don’t want to spoil it for you as someone did for me.

I will start by saying I am a Shyamalan fan.  No, not his newer stuff, but his early movies are some of my favorites.  I can still remember an idiot spoiling The Sixth Sense for me in speech class in high school.  It had only been out for a couple of weeks and he thought it would be funny to spoil it for everyone.  So when I finally got to see it, even though I knew the twist, I still loved it.  Then came Unbreakable, which is still one of the best comic book movies of all time.  Some people thought it was long and boring, but that’s what I love about Shyamalan.  He is deliberate, has a story to tell, and takes his time doing it.  I have to say I really liked Signs and The Village too.   The Lady in the Water was a somewhat surreal experience as I was the only person in the theater.  I did not think it was great, but it was pretty good for what it was (a fairy tale).  Then there was The Happening, one of the most disappointing movies I have ever seen.  I skipped The Last Airbender, but I did make my way to After Earth which, while not great, is not as bad as many people say.  I wanted to see The Visit, but I have not had a chance to yet.

How big of a fan am I?  One of my most memorable papers in undergrad was for a class on Edgar Allan Poe where I compared the use of colors in Shyamalan’s movies to Poe’s works.  (Alfred Hitchcock, by the way, is the intermediary.  Hitchcock loved Poe, Shyamalan loves Hitchcock.)  This is what I’m talking about deliberate, watch his movies and look at his use of colors.  Mr. Glass always is in purple or there is purple around him.  David Dunn is surrounded by green.  Anything that a dead person interacts with in The Sixth Sense is red (that’s the biggest clue about Willis’ character).  I could go on, but you get the point.

Leading up to Split was a weird thing.  The first time I saw a trailer, I was mildly interested.  At some point I decided it was a “wait until home video” movie.  Then, when it came out, I started to hear good things.  I changed my mind and decided I would see it, but I just did not have time.  Then, sometime last week (after only a week in the theaters) I unfortunately saw a story on the frontpage of Yahoo that spoiled the ending.  “What does Shyamalan have in plan for Unbreakable 3?”  At first I thought it was a typo, but then I realized, no, Split is #2.  Well that’s great, thanks for spoiling it right away.  I figured I’d take it like The Sixth Sense and go anyways, though unfortunately instead of just watching the movie like most people I was waiting for the reveal.

Before getting to that, let’s talk about the movie.  It’s definitely signature Shyamalan.  It takes its time, spending extra beats on scenes that most movies would quick cut from.  I see it as a great callback to older movies that have similar paces, though unfortunately many people today just say “it’s boring.”  It’s also sometimes overly serious, especially with the psychologist.  It’s beautifully shot.  No matter what you think about his movies, no matter how bad they might be, they are always beautiful.

Then there’s James McAvoy.  WOW!  I’ve known for awhile that he’s a very good actor, but this was amazing.  He went for it with each of the personalities and knocked it out of the park.  So many people are talking about the little boy, Hedwig, and rightly so.

  For me, Patricia was the most impressive.

The rest of the cast was very good as well.  At first the main girl, Casey, seemed weird, but as we learn her history we definitely understand why she is the way she is.  I will agree that many of the other characters are not well fleshed out, that’s a legitimate complaint about the movie, but it is not a huge problem.

Now, let’s talk about the ending.  As the story is leading up to the beast, I was worrying how far they would go.

  In the end, I thought it was an interesting turn, and it is especially good when considered in the full story as the creation of a supervillain.  Since I already knew the connection to Unbreakable, I had an idea this was where it was headed, so I was not as surprised as some people and even had a different view on the beast.  As someone else said, Shyamalan has done a superhero origin better than DC and a villain better than Marvel.  It’s also interesting, and I did not catch this, that when he laid the flowers at the train station it is possible/probable that it is the train crash initiated by Mr. Glass, meaning he created both a superhero and a supervillain with one act.  This is a great comic trope.

The way Casey was spared was a bit weak, but it also kind of makes sense.  I just wanted to see her fight back a little more.  The good thing is that means the beast (or The Horde?) is still lose, which means Bruce Willis will hunt him down.

Speaking of…I really liked the reveal.  Even though I knew what was coming, when I started to hear the Unbreakable theme playing I started to get really pumped.  The comment from the random woman about what happened 15 years ago, I suppose it is unusual that someone would remember that, but not necessarily if it was well known how many people Mr. Glass killed.  That final shot of Bruce Willis was just a great nod to the fans.  I am very much looking forward to more in the Unbreakable franchise.  I remember reading back in 2000 that Shyamalan had been planning a trilogy from the beginning.  I am glad that he is finally getting a chance to finish that project.

So, I really liked the movie.  It was suspenseful, well acted, beautifully shot, and had me wanting more.  I’d give it a solid 8/10.

How would I rank the movies?  This is fairly simple.

The great:

The Sixth Sense

Unbreakable

The good:

Split

Signs

The Village

Ok:

Devil (producer)

Lady in the Water

After Earth

Ugly:

The Happening

Another great aspect of Shyamalan movies has long been his use of James Newton Howard (though unfortunately not in his last two).  This is truly one of the best director/composer combinations of all time.  This ranking is a little harder.  The amazing thing is all of these are good, if not great.

The Village (it does not get any better than Hillary Hahn’s violin in The Gravel Road)

Unbreakable

Signs

The Sixth Sense

Lady in the Water (if the whole score was as good as The Great Eatlon this would be much higher)

Split

After Earth

The Happening

The Last Airbender

Rogue One Review and Star Wars Franchise Ranking

I finally got to see Rogue One for a second time, which means I can finally give it a proper review.  The problem is I have changed my placement of it in the series (see below) many times, so it’s a very fluid process.  But, first, the movie.  Obviously, many spoilers ahead.

To start with, the hype.  After the first trailer, I was very much looking forward to this movie.  Then I heard about the re-writes, and I was worried.  This was supposed to be a gritty war movie.  Was Disney destroying it?  The trailers still looked good, but I went into the movie with muted anticipation.

Let’s start with the beginning (a very good place to start).  No scroll: I guess I’m okay with it.  It’s not part of the main story, so something different is not a big deal.  And for people who said they were lost without it?  Give me a break.  You don’t need to read the book leading up to it to know exactly what is happening.  (Similarly, some people said they were surprised about the story, they didn’t know it was about the first Death Star.  Are you kidding me?  Did you watch any of the trailers?  It was quite obvious.)

I love the universe expansion.  That has always been one of the greatest things about Star Wars: the ability to visit innumerable places.  They did a really good job of showing a new side of the universe.  For the most part, the main characters are not in it, and where they are it works (except the droids, which are just kind of thrown in to say they’ve been in every one).

Speaking of main characters, DARTH VADER!!!  I knew he would be in it, but did not expect as much as we got.  I loved finally seeing his castle.  And that scene!  You know which one.  Wow!  That leads to one of my other favorite parts of the movie.

I feel like we finally saw the Empire being the Empire.  No-holds-barred evil.  Destroy a couple of cities?  No problem.  But it’s not for no reason.  I actually for once found sympathy for the empire, they’re doing what they think needs to be done to bring order to the galaxy.  That seems plausible.

What about the new characters?  I found them to be a mixed bag, and not necessarily in a good way.  The strength was definitely in the supporting characters, where there are a number of really great additions.  Chief among them is Chirrut, who has quickly become one of my favorites in all of Star Wars.  His blind faith made him quite the kick ass fighter.  His friend, Baze, is pretty cool as well in his reservedness (and his “little sister” comment is one of the great moments.)  Then there’s K-2SO, who is already the best droid (sorry R2) in the galaxy.  Not surprising since Alan Tudyk is the best character actor going.  Krennic was a pretty good villain as well.  He seemed to have a cool head and was driven, exactly what you would expect from his position.  I will also add I really liked most of the cameos (as mentioned the droids excepted) but especially liked Red and Yellow leaders and really liked seeing Bail Organa again.

Unfortunately, I was not as impressed with the main characters.  Jyn was just okay.  Maybe it’s bad comparing her to Rey, but she’s clearly not as interesting.  For someone who’s supposed to be strong, trained by a military expert, she doesn’t do that much (except one scene in Jedha).  Cassian has the problem of peaking early, like his first scene.  I felt like there was great potential for a character there – a good guy who is willing to do whatever it takes to succeed, even killing a “friend” – but it was not fully explored.  I wanted to like both of them, and it’s not that I did not like them, just that I wanted more.

This leads me to one of my biggest problems with the movie.  I really did not like the CGI Tarkin and Leia, and thought they distracted from what was going on.  When at first they only showed Tarkin from behind, I thought it would work well.  As soon as they showed his face, I thought it looked bad, like those bad Zemeckis CGI movies.  I really wish they had not gone with it.

Let’s talk about the music.  I was kind of bummed when they replaced Alexandre Desplat.  After his Godzilla, I was interested to hear what he came up with.  I wonder if he recorded anything that we can hear?  That being said, they found the perfect replacement.  In fact, from the beginning I had assumed that if Williams didn’t score Star Wars, Giacchino would be the best replacement.  After all, he became famous by being a Williams-lite with the video games of The Lost World and Medal of Honor (which sounds very much like Saving Private Ryan).  First listen in the movie, I was a bit underwhelmed.  But then again, I said the same thing with The Force Awakens.  After a second viewing and listening to the score, I will say it’s a good addition to the best scored franchise.  He throws in the famous Williams themes at appropriate moments, and I really liked the transition of the original Darth Vader theme into the Imperial theme when Krennic meets Vader. It's especially impressive since he only had just over a month to compete it.

Now, the two biggest positives.  First, it ended up being what I hoped it would be.  For the first time, I felt like I was watching a war in the stars.  Some people say it lagged a bit in the middle.  I did not think it was that bad, and anyways the final act is fantastic.  In some ways, it reminded me of Return of the Jedi (that’s a good thing) with the relentless final third of action.  And it wasn’t just action for action sake.  It also thankfully avoided a trope I really dislike; I call it going “Phantom Menace”, where everyone seems to be done at the same time before they all turn it around and save the day (see also: The Avengers).  Oh, and I was really looking forward to the AT-ACT beach scene, and while it wasn't long it was good.

Which leads me to my second biggest positive: they did not hesitate to kill everyone off.  I was worried about this, especially knowing Disney had a hand in it.  Not everything has a have a happy ending, in fact the best Star Wars movie (see below) obviously did not.  Not that Rogue One has a “sad” ending, but it’s certainly not happy for everyone.  I’m very glad they went that route.

Some people are upset with the very end, saying it makes the beginning of A New Hope not make sense.  He just saw them leave, why is Vader questioning them then?  Two points: I doubt A New Hope happens right afterward (after all, Tatooine is probably far away from Scarif).  Also, the Corellian Corvette is not a unique ship, in fact there are many, so it would probably take them awhile to track down the right one.

So, the movie is not perfect of course.  There are a few somewhat major faults.  Overall, the greatness definitely outweigh the problems.  I give it a solid 8 out of 10.

And now, let’s look at the franchise.  The definitive ranking of the Star Wars movies, which could very easily change as soon as you read this:

1.      The Empire Strikes Back

No surprise here.  Everyone knows it’s the best, the most perfect.

2.      A New Hope

Picking the second best is actually the most difficult choice.  I have this #2 because it’s the one that made it all happen.  If it wasn’t this good, we wouldn’t have the rest.

3.       Rogue One

I really have changed this ranking at least 6 times since I saw it the first time, everywhere from #2 to #5.  I’m pretty happy with it here, though again it’s pretty flexible.  The biggest thing is, as I said, the strengths greatly outweigh the weaknesses.

4.       Return of the Jedi

Proving I have no bias, this has always been my favorite movie, because it showcases my favorite character (Luke) in the best way.  It still does not get any better than the fight at the Sarlacc Pit.  The ewoks (and Han not flying the Millennium Falcon) are the only thing keeping this from being #2.

5.      The Force Awakens

I really like this movie, and it’s hard to have it this low.  I have no problems with it being a “rehash” of A New Hope.  In fact, I thought that was a good thing.  I liked all the new characters.  It left me wanting more (I’ve always said if Episode 8 was in the next theater I would have immediately gone there).  The only real problem with it is that terrible rathtars scene.

6.      Revenge of the Sith

I really like this movie, and nearly had it higher.  The Obi Won/Anakin duel is one of the best scenes in the franchise.  Unfortunately it comes right after “Anakin, you’re breaking my heart.”  I also really like the ruthless Anakin in the Jedi Temple.  Also, the opening space battle is the best space battle in the franchise.

7.      Attack of the Clones

Some people have this as the worst, but I cannot do that.  This is the most extreme of the movies.  On the one hand, I love the Kenobi spy storyline.  On the other hand, that love story.  Ugh.  The Kenobi story and Yoda’s lightsaber fighting make this clearly not the worst.

8.      The Phantom Menace

Jar Jar, young Anakin, politics, just bad.  Then there’s the final battle, where two-thirds of it is atrocious but the Darth Maul fight is the best in the franchise.  So it’s not all bad.

Passengers: Movie Review

It’s been a long time, between a hectic end of semester and Christmas break at home (where I never get anything done, even when all I set for myself was to learn the Latin Mass parts for the server) I just haven’t had time to write anything.  So I’m back, at least for now.

I finally got to see Passengers.  This was a movie I was very much looking forward to, even despite the poor reviews.  I was hooked from the trailers: a relatively new concept for science fiction (though similar to a story I had thought about for the past decade or so), two of my favorite actors, and sleek-looking trailers.  I wanted the movie to be good, though tempered after the aforementioned reviews.

To put it simple, I thought it was…not bad.  Let me start with some of the positives.  (Spoilers follow)

As would be expected, the acting was quite good.  Chris Pratt has proven to be able to do just about anything.  He was believable as a man stuck by himself in his desperation.  Jennifer Lawrence was also quite good, though somewhat going through the motions.  In other words, she was more Hunger Games and less Silver Linings Playbook.  That being said, I bought their relationship.

It was also a very good looking movie.  The special effects were very good, especially the water bubble when they lose gravity and the star as they fly by.  I also really liked the look of the ship, it was pretty different from what we’re used to.

As would be expected, Thomas Newman brings the goods, though as at least one review stated it was mixed a little loud at times.  We’re moving into the good-bad parts of the movie.

The tempo was a little off.  This is something that I will get into more after the review, but there were aspects that I would really have liked them to deal with more.  For instance, there is a huge ethical dilemma in the movie. Chris Pratt is so isolated he nearly kills himself.  I can buy that.  He stumbles upon a girl who attracts him, and he “falls in love” with her.  All good.  Then you have the huge ethical dilemma: go crazy by himself or doom someone else to die by waking them up?  They deal with it a little, but not nearly as much as it needed to be.  That being said, I thought Pratt did a great job of expressing the inner turmoil, especially after she wakes up, until she finally says “thank you.”

There are always the problems of convenience.  It’s a good thing he’s a mechanical engineer, so he can fix things.  It’s a good thing the one crew member wakes up so he can help them just when they need it.  Again, I know in each movie there will be conveniences, this just got to me a little bit.

There’s also the bad science.  Hearing the space collisions at the beginning of the movie, especially after Gravity did it so well a few years ago, was a bit disappointing.  Then there’s the whole “death and resurrection” of Pratt at the end.  The science was overall a little too Hollywood.

There’s also the stakes.  You don’t every really feel worried about them.  The trailers told you pretty much everything that’s going to happen, so no surprises.  It’s all a bit paint-by-numbers, which is disappointing especially after we’ve seen a slate of good science fiction movies in recent years with similar themes (Moon, Gravity, Interstellar, etc).  I just expected more.

So, in the end I think it’s good, but had the potential to be so much more.  There’s nothing really “bad” about it, but it also doesn’t really stand out.  I’d give it a 7 out of 10.

Now, as I was driving from the theatre thinking about it, I think I figured out how it could have been much better.  In effect, there was too much story for a two hour movie.  It really should have been a television event, like an 8-10 episode series like Stranger Things or something.  Here’s how I would envision it:

The pilot sets up the whole story.  It’s basically the first half of the first act of the movie.  The Avalon is travelling in space, something happens, and Pratt wakes up.  The rest of the episode is him trying to figure out what went wrong.  It ends with the bartender telling him to live a little.

The second episode is him living a little.  It gives you (and him) time to explore the place.  But it also shows how tedious it all is, how even in the fun he feels the isolation.  End with his spacewalk and near suicide.

The third episode introduces Aurora.  One day she’s just all of a sudden there as Pratt is walking around the station (the original screenplay had the reveal of him waking her up in the final act-which would have been much better).  He is cautiously happy to have a companion, while she is going through all of the problems he had in the first couple of episodes.  He helps her realize more quickly that they’re in it together.

The fourth episode is the relationship episode.  They fall in love with each other and everything is great.  It ends with some kind of problem on the ship.

The fifth episode is them working together to temporarily fix whatever is wrong, but realize it’s just a patch.  This episode ends with the big reveal that he woke her up.  Just when things seem bright, they get darker and darker.

The sixth episode is their estrangement.  It really gives time to explore both sides of the moral dilemma.  Why did he do it?  How does she respond?  This is probably the most interesting episode.

The seventh episode introduces the crew member.  He’s not going to be just a convenience; he’s going to stick around a little while.  A third wheel, making their relationship even more strained.  Meanwhile the ship is in it bad.  Things are failing all over.  Basically this is the first half of the final act of the movie.

The eighth episode resolves the problem.  They have to work together, maybe the crew member dies in the accident (not because of health problems, something dramatic), and Aurora realizes she cannot go it alone.  The thing is, she needs him more out of human necessity, not the new found love as in the movie.  They fix the ship, but there is still tension.  They should not be in love with each other in the end, but more stuck in this thing together.  That’s more realistic.  End on a semi-happy survival note.

Then it could be really interesting to see more of what happens.  I would love another season or more, but I think it would be cool if future seasons were a mix between the two on the ship and the future on Homestead II.  Someone is reading her story (so their timeline is flashbacks) as they are settling the new world.  That would really expand the whole story and make it more compelling.  Anyways, I know this isn’t going to happen, but I still think it would be interesting.

I think that’s enough on Passengers for now.  Next I need to see Rogue One again so I can properly rank the Star Wars movies as they currently stand.

Star Trek...Beyond

I will begin this mini review of Star Trek Beyond by saying I am not a big fan of the Star Trek reboot series.  I have said this many times before, but it's a bit too much Star Wars and not enough Star Trek (which might seem weird since I'm a huge Star Wars fan, but the two need to be separate).  That being said, either I have softened my stance, or this third one really is the best of the bunch so far.

Pros:

The effects and makeup are fantastic.  There's one scene at the end (I don't want to spoil anything) with the good guys facing off against the bad guys in space.  If you've seen it, you know what I mean.  That looked great.

The cast has always been the strongest part of the reboot, though they've had a bit of a problem balancing between playing the originals and being themselves.  I think they've finally got it down just about right.  And the relationships, especially between Bones and Kirk, are good.  Idris Elba was pretty good.  Sofia Boutella was a stand out.  Jaylah is a great character.

The story was original but still "Trek-y" enough.  It was a fun movie.  And, unlike the first movie (outrunning a black hole) there wasn't any obnoxiously bad science.  Bad science, yes, but not stupid.  And no second-rate retreads of baddies.

Cons:

Still a little too much action for me.  I guess you can tell I'm a fan of the Next Generation, because they were the pinnacle of the series for me.  They had action when needed, but they also made you think.  The series is missing the cerebral part that makes Star Trek Star Trek.

Speaking of action, this runs into the same problems as too many action movies today: quick cuts, close up cameras, and too dark making it impossible to see what's going on.  You get the general idea, but at times it's very hard to follow the action.

Conveniences.  This kind of goes with the cerebral part.  We need something...oh there it is!  This happens a bit too many times and it gets annoying.

Again, overall it's a good addition to the franchise. 

7.5/10

Now, let me share my unquestionably perfect ranking of the Star Trek movies:

13.  Star Trek V: The Final Frontier  2/10

            The pretty much universal worst of the bunch.  There's nothing good to say about it.  And then Nichelle Nichols dances.

12.  Star Trek: The Motion Picture  4/10

            It took me three tries to get through this dull attempt at copying the terrible 2001.  The only good thing about this is it includes the best score of the franchise.  That poster is a thousand times more interesting than the movie.

11.  Star Trek IV: The Voyage Home  4/10

            Some people love this (one in particular I have argued over this), I hate it.  The "humor" is mostly dumb and it just doesn't feel like a Star Trek movie.  Heavy handed environmentalism much?

10.  Star Trek: Nemesis  5/10

            The first time I saw it, I thought it was alright.  Each subsequent viewing it gets worse.  Too bad this was the send-off for the best crew.

9.  Star Trek Into Darkness 6/10

            The bombing scene is pretty great, the rest is a mess of over-the-top action and bad copies of Wrath of Khan.

8.  Star Trek III: The Search for Spock 7/10

            It's not a bad movie, but there's also little in it that stands out.

7.  Star Trek (reboot) 7/10

            I remember walking out of seeing this in IMAX at Kennedy Space Center and immediately disagreeing with my two friends who said this was the best Star Trek movie ever.  The villain is lackluster, and I can never get over them escaping a black hole.

6.  Star Trek: Generations 7/10

            I think this movie gets more flack than it deserves.  It's a pretty good bridge between the crews.  And get over the ending.

5.  Star Trek Beyond 7.5/10

            See above.

4.  Star Trek: Insurrection 7.5/10

            Saw this in the theater and didn't like it.  For a long time it was in the bottom three for me.  Rewatched a couple of years ago and really liked it.  My love of the Next Generation crew comes out.  One thing that can't be argued: that's got to be the worst Star Trek movie poster.

3.  Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan 8/10

            Start the hate.  Yes, it's a good movie with a great villain and an iconic ending.  That doesn't mean it's the best.

2.  Star Trek: First Contact 9/10

            Such a great use of the Next Generation cast and the best villains in Star Trek.  The borg are frightening, the tension is always there, but it doesn't have to be a non-stop action thrill ride because the movie lets the story play out.

1.  Star Trek VI: The Undiscovered Country 9/10

            The first one I saw in the theater.  It still blows me away.  I nearly used it in class as an allegory for the Cold War.  And you can have Khan, give me Christopher Plummer's Chang quoting Shakespeare (in the original Klingon) any day.

Bonus: Galaxy Quest 9/10

            Yes, if I were to rank this (as one Star Trek convention poll did), I would have it #3.  That's right, above Wrath of Khan.  Again, bring the hate.  The best parody movie ever.

A quick ranking of the scores, because there are some great ones.

13.  Voyage Home (Leonard Rosenman) F

            The only one I don't bother having.

12.  The Final Frontier (Jerry Goldsmith) D-

            Nearly as bad as the movie.

11.  Nemesis (Jerry Goldsmith) D

            Pretty forgettable, unfortunately.

10.  Insurrection (Jerry Goldsmith) C

            Goldsmith losing his touch.

9.  Beyond (Michael Giacchino) C+

            I have yet to hear it on its own, but in the movie it did not stand out.

8.  Generations (Dennis McCarthy) C+

            I like the Nexus theme, but the rest is somewhat forgettable.

7.  Wrath of Khan (James Horner) C+

            Some people have this #1, and that's because they're idiots.  It's more important for basically making Horner's career.

6.  Search for Spock (James Horner) B-

            Basically just a copy of Wrath of Khan with some good

5.  Into Darkness (Michael Giacchino) B

            Like the movie, the bomb scene is great, the rest is ok.

4.  First Contact (Jerry Goldsmith) B

            Some good action cues.

3.  The Undiscovered Country (Cliff Eidelman) A-

            Here's a composer who came out of nowhere, wrote a fantastically epic score, then has done basically nothing, unless you count The Beautician and the Beast something.

2.  Star Trek (Michael Giacchino) A

            Giacchino does a great job of making the themes to the original series epically great.

1.  The Motion Picture (Jerry Goldsmith) A+

            It might be Goldsmith's best ever. The six minute Enterprise flyby is one of the greatest compositions ever.  Oh yes, and it gave us the Next Generation theme.

Another bonus: Galaxy Quest (David Newman) B

            Sounds a little too television at times, but that's kind of the point.  Somewhere around #5 on the list.

Independence Day: Resurgence

Let me just say, the fact that I am writing this is not a good sign.  In fact, I'll cut to the chase: the Independence Day sequel is terrible.  Awful.  There's really nothing good going for it.

The worst thing for me was the editing.  It looked like it was cut by someone with the attention span of a 3 year old.  It's like every scene is missing a beat at the beginning and the end.  And, some of the cuts make no sense, going to a character just so they can make a "funny" comment.  But that's another thing, all of the "comedy" falls flat.  Unlike the original, which was greatly aided by Will Smith and Jeff Goldblum, none of the "funny" bits land, at all.

While we're on actors, yeesh.  This is some of the worst acting I've seen in a while, even from some otherwise good actors (Goldblum, Bill Pullman, Brent Spiner, Sela Ward).  The young actors are all terrible.  You can probably find better acting in a SyFy movie.

The plot: what can you say?  It's so rushed you don't really have time to think about it, which is probably a good thing.  It's so full of clichés and false cliffhangers it's ridiculous.  You can tell exactly what is going to happen with each character well before it does.

Should I mention science?  Only because it's so bad it's not even funny.  I'm not an expert (SPOILER) but I'm pretty sure a giant hole drilled into the ocean "a mile wide" that comes within a minute of reaching the core (whatever that means) would cause immense damage, not to mention all of the seawater that would drain into it.  Would there be any left?  I don't know, but it seems like those who made the movie didn't bother to think about it.

It's really not worth it to go into it any more, except that it's so bad it almost made me angry.  That's hard to do, especially since I went into it with low expectations thanks to all the bad press.

Make no mistake, this is one of the worst movies I have seen.  It should not be surprising, coming from the men who have made 2012, 10,000 BC, The Day After Tomorrow, and Godzilla (1998).  Stargate seems like a long time ago.

Grade: 2/10